I mentioned in a couple comments in a couple other places
that the Mrs. and I were planning to attend a black-tie charity event in
town. The Mrs. wanted to do it and got
us the tickets. I went whole-hog and got
us a limo for the night, the expense of which was totally worth it once I saw
how excited she was over getting a limo ride.
I took her to one of those “OMG YOU GOT A TABLE THERE?!” restaurants and
had one of the best steaks I’ve ever eaten.
Then we hit the event.
It was unremarkable in every way except one:
Apparently, folks these days have no concept of the fact
that “black tie” actually means something.
“Black tie” is a condensed way of expressing the fact that an event has
a very specific dress code:
For men, it involves a black dinner jacket with satin collar
and lapels, white shirt, black pants with the satin stripe down the side, and a
black neck tie and patent leather shoes (think James Bond, and you'll be there).
For women, it is generally an ankle or calf-length gown. My wife had this ankle-length dark blue
number with an open back and spaghetti straps.
I got the standard by standard black tie tuxedo.
The thing is, if the event really means it, this dress code
isn’t negotiable. Many events will turn
you away at the door if you don’t come in “black tie” apparel.
Apparently, the “black tie” part of this event was just a
polite suggestion. The worst dressed man
I saw there was wearing gym shorts, a red hoodie sweatshirt, and a baseball cap
with long, unwashed hair coming out from under it. The most common outfit for men was a nice
pair of blue jeans and a button up shirt.
There were a few more that came in dockers and a button up shirt,
several of them with a neck tie. There
were only four other men out of over a hundred men there who actually met the
dress code, me included.
Look, guys, I know that you probably didn’t have education
in this sort of stuff, because the public schools are too busy teaching you
about multi-culturalism to actually give you any culture, but if a damned
backwoods boy like myself can be arsed to know about “black tie” and what that
means, I don’t think it’s too damned much to ask you to Google it real quick
before you show up to an affair that has explicitly set a dress code. It pissed me off that I was one of only four
men who actually figured it out, but that regardless, I was the one who got to
feel overdressed and uncomfortable for the evening.
Mrs. Goober looked lovely, and I think it did her some good
to dress up and unwind for a night. We
had a good time, and rang in the New Year like a boss. Hell, I’d even go do far as to say we did it
like a SIR….
There's a certain satisfaction in doing things right, even if others are slacking at it. Certainly the guy wearing gym shorts and a hoodie was showing remarkably little respect to the event and, by natural extension, the charity involved. Pity.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, I've only just recently learned the rules for black-tie, and how they relate to white-tie or formal attire. At the least, though, I would have expected much more than jeans and a nice shirt. Well done, Sir, for your knowledge and respect!
I don't expect everyone to know all aspects of formal dress rules and regulations. The only reason I know these things is because of a wikipedia bing on went on a few years back that somehow included a link to the ins and outs of formal attire.
DeleteThe funny thing is, I don't know the ins and outs of "white tie." Never linked to that page. But if I got invited to a "white tie" event, I'd damn sure Google it and figure it out before I went.
It's about respect. When someone invites you to an event, and asks you to dress to some code as a prerequisite to entering that event, I can't even fathom how anyone could see showing up in anything less as anything but rude and disrespectful. There is a reason a lot of these events turn people away at the door if they aren't dressed to code - it isn't because the people inside are too snooty to deal with someone "less than code" attire; no, it's because that guy is showing remarkable disrespect and rudeness to the person who launched the event, and should be treated as such.
I eventually figured out that I am more comfortable being over dressed than I am being under dressed. At least if you are over dressed for the crowd but appropriate for the event you can write a screed such as the above. All you can do if under dressed is celebrate your buffoonery.
ReplyDeleteI took my wife to a nice restaurant for our anniversary this past week end. Given where we live I was sure I could get away wearing jeans if I chose. I also knew my wife would be happier and feel a bit more special if I upped my game a bit. No contest. Dress boots, silver buckle, etc. won in a walk. Sure enough. I was one of the better dressed men there. (The temps were in single digits so everyone made a concession or two for winter.)
Good on ya. Don't forget to accessorze your tux.
ReplyDeleteThem er classy, ain't they?
DeleteI don’t think it’s too damned much to ask you to Google it real quick before you show up to an affair that has explicitly set a dress code. The only reason I know these things is because of a wikipedia bing on went on a few years back that somehow included a link to the ins and outs of formal attire.
ReplyDeleteRegards,
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