Thursday, June 19, 2014

I don't get it...

Another one of my friends’ wives just went off the reservation, decided that she is “not happy” and, apparently, that her lack of happiness must be his fault.  She’s leaving him. 

I’m taking even money on the pool to see how many months it is before she comes back to him, begging him to take her back.  My guess is less than 3. 

I don’t say this because I’m cynical or ugly or misogynist.  I say this because it has happened 6 times in just my group of friends now, and countless more times to people that I know, or have heard of.  It seems like sometime around their mid-thirties, many women have a switch throw in their head that has them immediately, and without any warning whatsoever, go off in search of greener pastures.  Usually the excuse is that they aren’t “happy.”  There is generally no explanation as to why their husband is the one responsible for that. 

I can only hope for my friend’s sake that she doesn’t go the “full nuclear” route, getting restraining orders, lying about him being abusive, and taking his children away from him.  That has happened before, too. 

The thing I can’t figure out is how these men end up taking them back, nearly every time.  One of my friend’s wives took off for three months, banged her yoga instructor for a while, and then when she found out that his lawyer wasn’t going to let her have all of his shit and take the kids away from him, she went back to him, seeking his forgiveness. 


Being a man in his mid-thirties, married to a woman in her mid-thirties, it’s like having the fucking sword of Damocles hanging over my head.  The problem is that I never see it coming.  I’m always convinced that everything is fine by all outward appearances, and then BAM!  My friend’s life falls down around his ears, and his wife goes off in search of…

…whatever.  Something else.  Something better than HIM. 

I think I need to have a talk with Mrs. Goober tonight.  Maybe she can shed some light on this for me, because I simply cannot see how a person can just up and decide to shitcan 10 years of marriage over what amounts to ethereal nothingness (she cannot elaborate a single, solitary item that is causing her to leave.  Just a feeling of general unhappiness and malaise).  What ever happened to buckling down and trying to work it out?  Why are these women so focused on their husbands bringing them happiness, rather than just going out and finding it for themselves?  So that they can blame him when they are unhappy?

Just to make a point, the two guys I’m talking about right now are both big time stand up guys.  Men.  Fathers.  Providers.  Both of them are in excellent physical shape, with six pack abs and the works.  Both of them have very good jobs and bring in good money.  Their wives have never wanted for anything. 

What causes this?  I honestly don’t understand.   

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